Time after time after time after time...

"Oh my god...Wait and see, what will soon become of me..."

Time.
Reading 'Einstein's Dreams' seems to fit, but I don't recall what I've read before. Makes me think of Adie...

Time has had an odd effect on me lately. In attempting to disconnect from it, or at the least, acknowledge it for what it is, but not be controlled by it, I think I have inadvertenly upset the universe.
Time has been playing tricks on me.

I drove home the other night in much less time than it is supposed to take. Upon arriving, the time had passed as it should have - the clock showed what it should have - but I didn't experience the time as I should have. I'm not making sense.

I walked down the beach last night in a t-shirt in the rain...I've been doing that a lot lately.
Walking in the bitter cold. Alone.
I didn't feel it - the bite of the wind against my skin. I don't often feel it anymore.
I feel warmth inside like I never have.

Waves moved across the shore in rhythmic succession...the haze on the horizon obscured my view of the miniature Seattle skyline across the waters.
And then it started happening again.
As if I were standing helpless in the middle of a time-lapse photography film, the sky accelerated - the clouds and mist whipped by, tiny blinks of lights from planes overhead streaked like so many meteorites...and then it was back to normal.
Taking a few more steps, I was suddenly moving in half-time, slow-motion Matrix-style...I continued at my own pace, in awe of the jet flying by that seemed to have hit a wall, and then slowly climbed up and out and through...
Ripples crawled across the calm waters.
Waves that should have crested and crashed hung with uneasy anticipation and slowly melted into the smooth sand as though the conductor had simply slowed his wand, lifted it slowly again, and side, and down, and up, and side-side, down...and finally release.

I can't explain it. And I am not doing it justice.

Perhaps another time.

Now to find more rings of lights. As they encircled my car as I drove to the beach.
Perhaps tonight I'll find clarity.