Life 2.0 (beta)

Life coaching. How does one decide that they need to be guided in living life? We have teachers, professors, instructors, psychologists, priests, whatever...and coaches, though primarily in sports. But a coach in life...
Have we detached so far from the Truth of the universe, so far from Other and everything else that IS outside of our mindless brainwashed robotic lives that we need coaches to reign us in and open our eyes to our own ability to take hold and BE? Apparently so. Out of the world's population of human beings, all who lead lives day-by-day, going through the motions, supposedly knowing what they are doing in the world enough to continue to live - I decided to find help. Would my life have been easier or better or the same or whatever if I had not? Who knows...
After a decade of psychiatric help that in reflection was no more than someone else guided by the corporate and capitalist hand of Western society to decide that the drugs companies could make more money if it was determined by an arbitrary set of traits that befalls all humans at some point or another that I was a) Uni-Polar, then Bi-Polar/Manic Depressive, b) Obsessive-Compulsive, and c) Anxious, I realized that 1) I couldn't afford the ever-changing plethora of drugs I was "supposed" to take, 2) I didn't need them.

So in a nutshell I occasionally used to fall into the pits of despair and depression, otherwise known as reaction to bad life expereinces or random vague happenings that had no bearing on reality, to the extreme low side of sadness and apathy. I have a "thing" about organizing stuff. Usually other people's stuff...because my own stuff usually is in quite the extreme of disarray. And I get anxious to the point of hyperventilating and passing out.

But. I don't anymore. In corporate America, the high-tech world of rat-race mentality, I used to have all of those things constantly tripping me up.
But I realized after a year of living on Whidbey Island that the reason I was tripping was that I was on the wrong path - a volatile path full of pitfalls and land mines and lots and lots of things to trip over. After waking up, so to speak, I starting running down the right path at high speed, only to find out I had no map or internal GPS to guide me on my way. But at least I was no longer categorically a Mentally Ill person.
I no longer have to worry about the psychotropic blanket covering up symptoms of something that doesn't have to exist in the first place if only I were able to live a healthly fulfilling life...
But maybe I am crazy, oops, I mean mentally ill. More like mentally unstable. More like creatively living. Artistically Being.

But if all of this amazing knowledge that has lead me to understand that I don't need be tethered to my mind constantly anyway - that I can use it when I need it but detach when I don't - holds water at all, then I should be ok. Fine. Good. Well.

Well well well...

We shall see. Two months or so of this has passed already. I connected with a magnificient coach. I am on my path. I sometimes veer away, I haven't even had an appointment for three weeks. But I will again next week. I'm doing my homework. I'm living life to the best of my abilities, and beyond (which is the trippy part I don't quite get yet).
I suppose it's more like life is happening, and some of the abilities I have I just don't comprehend yet. One of those little catch-22's that happens...I can't wrap my mind around it, because it exists outside my mind, but in order to comprehend it, I need to be able to control it with my mind, which can't seem to "get it". Lovely.

Anyway.

Such is life.